Thank The Lord For Your Presence # 12

Author's Note: My computer just crashed as I was nearly finished writing this review, and I lost it all. As a result, I am feeling very upset and angry at the moment, and this version is going to be considerably shorter than the one you were going to read, had the computer let me finish the damn final sentence I was writing at the time. I had written a very lengthy and detailed review, of which I was very proud, so my frustration at losing it all is extremely high. Don't mention the war.



I'm going to say this right off the bat - I think this might have been the strongest episode of Thank God You're Here (TGYH) that they've done so far.

Strong words, I know, but although it may not have included the funniest scenes or comments ever heard on the series, the weakest of the guests in this episode (Dailan Evans, if you're wondering) was still very good and miles better than the weakest guest in other episodes.

I hope that makes sense.

And we were treated to return-appearances from two of my favourite TGYH guests so far - Shaun Micallef and Josh Lawson. Not to mention that a grave injustice from season one was finally righted in this episode: The disgrace that saw Shaun Micallef overlooked as winner in all of his season one appearances.

For my money, the same injustice is true of Josh Lawson. How both of these men could not have 'won' an episode in all the times they featured on the show is beyond me. Or it would be if I held any stock at all in Tom Gleisner's 'judging'. Hopefully Josh will be crowned winner of a future episode he may appear in.

Wifey and I switched on just as host Shane Bourne was walking onto the set, which meant we'd only just missed the opening credits ... which in turn meant that we didn't know who was on the show as special guests until he said their names really quickly as their introduction and they came out onto stage. But we were really happy with what we saw.

Well, with Shaun and Josh, anyway. As Melburnians, we didn't know Bianca from a bar of soap (although presumably I wouldn't confuse one for the other in a shower-type situation), and Dailan only served to remind me of The Wedge - which is something I never want to be reminded about. I must say that I expected him to be crap (and although I've already labelled him 'the weakest' of the four, there's no bias there - in fact, I was pleasantly surprised with some of his witty comments).

Shaun Micallef started us off with his portrayal of the leader of a group of climbers intent on scaling Mt Everest. Even before he entered the scene he had me laughing, asking Shane (who was taking far too much care when tipping a bucket of psuedo-snow over Shaun's head), "What is it - acid?", but then by explaining to his fellow climbers not to eat the snow, that they shouldn't wear their jumpsuits out socially (because then they're not tax deductable), and that the cars outside are parked beautifully, he made his mark on the scene. I loved it when he described the summit as "tall", and answered the question of how they'd get through the ice fields by saying they'd take the bus. When he ate one of the magnets from the whiteboard and then not-so-subtly coughed it back up before talking, it had the audience - and us at home - laughing. At the end of the scene, he was asked what they do if they run out of oxygen. His answer, "You die", was both simple and brilliant. He's an extremely funny guy and I admire everything he does. *swoons*

Dailan Evans was second, and 'following' Shaun Micallef is something I wouldn't wish on anyone (not even a star of one of my most despised TV shows at the moment). He seemed genuinely nervous, and the close of the scene petered out a bit as he either misunderstood the prompt he'd been given for a final word, or he deliberately tried to avoid the question and inadvertantly derailed the scene as a result. He looked promising when Shane told him to go through the door and he said, "After you", and I realised he may not be as unfunny as the show on which he regularly appears. He was a film reviewer, and was asked how long the film he'd just reviewed went for. He said one and a half hours, and then he was asked how that was possible, because it was meant to be a short film. His immediate reply was that he fell asleep (and his tone implied "derr!"). He delivered this line so perfectly, I instantly knew he was going to be better than expected. And he was. The scene itself didn't hold many memorable lines (except for the Warwick Capper-esque approach to filmmaking that the director has chosen), but he fumbled along nicely and was suitably amused by his surroundings (without almost taking a back seat like Anh Do did last week).

I'm not sure if being from Melbourne is an adequate excuse for not knowing who Bianca Dye is, but Shane's intro consisted purely of her Sydney FM radio work. To be honest, her voice sounded a little familiar, so maybe I've heard or seen her before after all. But the biggest surprise about Bianca was that she was REALLY FUNNY! Wifey and I were delighted to watch a woman on this show who wasn't awkward or a try-hard. And the scene she was given didn't fall into the usual category of "these guys can't write good scenes for chicks" ... she played a travel booking agent (complete with one of those trendy half-headsets), and she outdid herself with coming up with half of the opposing dialogue off her own bat. Instead of having the audience heat the Mr Hasham character who rang her up and complained about something (and what was with that decision, anyway?), Bianca was left to script her own difficult customer and then get out of the conversation as well! She did bloody well. My first version of this review contained all her best lines, but I'm not going to bother typing them all in again. She was great with Mr Hasham, hilarious when talking about the Tasmanian Tourism Board's great debate ("We couldn't prove it"), and her lines about the "captain's couch", no interruptions for food in "cargo class", "gold and silver leaf class" and the long line at Supre made us laugh. I would've been very happy for her to win the night, if not for both Shaun and Josh being long-overdue for a win. She was exceptionally good and I hope we see her back on the show again soon.

The scene featuring Josh Lawson* was the most enjoyable of the night, IMHO. Even though he was 'angry' throughout the scene (which usually detracts any humour from the situation), I didn't feel that this happened here. He explained later that the false moustache he was wearing (as an olde English explorer from the 1800s returning home to report on his findings at a gentlemen's club or something) prevented him from being able to smile, so he decided to just get angry at everything. It made it quite amusing, actually, and it was fun to watch the ensemble cast have to change gears in order to keep the scene 'real' and the plot moving. He had a great many lines that seemed wholely inappropriate for his time period (describing the Queen as "one saucy bitch" and a picture of two native girls as "a couple of sluts I met on a Contiki Tour"), but they just made the whole thing so ridiculous it was hysterical. His quick wit was exemplified when a native man (or highly unattractive native woman) with various rings through her bottom lip, causing it to be severely elongated, appeared in his slideshow and he was asked, "What is this, sir?" - his immediate and indignant reply was, "My wife, sir. How dare you!" He slapped the man with his glove, explained that the lip needed to be that big "for very personal reasons!", and immitated the tribe's dancing style as that of Shakira's. Before entering the scene, dressed as he was, he told Shane he thought the time for his character was late 2005. When he entered, and received the usual "Thank God you're here" opening line, he snapped, "Don't thank him!" (which took the audience a few seconds to 'get'). He then proceeded to snap at the servant who wanted to take his hat and coat ("Get your bloody own!") and his host who asked if he wanted to keep his spats on ("You keep your bloody spats on!"), before insulting the President of the Society by saying he'd refer to the books he's written as mere pamphlets. When the President then prompted him for where he'd been travelling, he mocked, "Ooooh! The pamphlet writer out of words!" There were easily more laughs in this scene than any other, and that's including some bits that may have been edited out!

The pre-recorded bits involved the guests appearing as the owner/operators of a shonky retirement village being investigated by a 4 Corners-style program (an idea that was used last season with Frank Woodley), and as the drive-thru window operator of an unnamed (but remarkably similar to the show's sponsor) fast food restaurant. Shaun and Josh had the best lines in these pre-recorded bits, but considering they'd done it all before and the other two were new (and these would have been their very first attempts at it, because they were filmed a couple of days earlier), you can forgive them that. I'll look at the scenes individually.

The retirement home scene was completed 'owned' by Josh. He had the most impressive array of one-liners for this one and truly shone in the whole episode, I thought. From establishing that he had a DIY policy in regards to health care needs, that he held roll-calls to familiarise himself with the residents' names and barcodes, that the 24 hour security guarantee was spread over the space of a year (his casual remark that they were due for another hour next Thursday was executed perfectly), that the "shared bunk beds thing" only really got started last week after they hosted a tequila party, and that his qualifications for running the centre consist of the fact that his parents are really old. Shaun was a close second in this scene, choosing to play the part as if his shonky retirement village owner is blissfully unaware that the interviewer plans to expose his corruption in the interview. He answers a question about how he reacts to allegations of disgraceful business dealings with, "Usually I affect a surprised expression (which he happily demonstrated) and then I get rather cross (which he also demonstrated before lapsing into a big helpful grin for the reporter)". He was then asked what he thought people generally look for in aged-care home, and he replied, "Their relatives - haha!" Dailan said something weak about two bushes residents could frolick or fall over in if they wanted to, and Bianca had an amusing description of the caravans some of the residents live in being rocked from side to side to give the impression of being on holidays ("Oooh, look - we're on the road!").

The drive-thru scene was also amusing, and Dailan had a couple of great lines in this one. When asked what he recommended for dessert, he proceeded to describe how to get to a place down the road. When asked if they had anything low fat, he snorted, said, "You're kidding, aren't you?", then composed himself and said "Yes we do ... a straw". I also liked his explanation of the Coriander Surprise sauce; when asked what the surprise was, he said, "It's just coriander". Bianca amused me with her description of what you get with a Fijian Burger: "It comes with a lay. A free lay." ["Oh, one of those flower things?" asked the customer.] "No, a lay." Shaun described the Glasgow sauce as containing haggis and Josh was very funny as he deliberately spoke in "broken speaker talk", defined 'space fries' as "two fries in a bag with a heaps of space between them", and cut out on his shift early to go golfing with the customer he just met - jumping out the drive-thru window to get in his car.

The group scene consisted of all four guests returning to the stage in Scout uniforms (another all-male costume that looked out of place on the female guest ... although thankfully this time we were spared the usual "boys are pleased about the girl dressing up as a boy and giving them some kind of amorous advantage" joke). The Scouts were meeting to brainstorm ways of making the Scouts more appealing or something, and Shaun's decline into maniacal territory is probably what earned him the win (I think Tom was scared Shaun might come after him later with that evil laugh), suggesting tattoos instead of badges, the use of "just a little bit" of dynamite to liven up their meetings, and so on. The scene wasn't filled with too many hilarious moments, although again Shaun untying his woggle got a great reaction from the other three players.

It was a fantastic episode and I only wish I had the inclination to re-type all the thoughts and opinions I'd originally included here before it was lost in the sands of time. But I don't.

Inexplicably, you can watch and/or download Matthew Newton's scene from the second episode of season one for yourself here. Because they said they'd post a scene from last night's show, and then after captioning Newton's scene as appearing in their third episode (which it clearly wasn't; you can see my original review here), this is quite bizarre. Looks like something didn't go ahead as planned and this was their quick-fix.


* Incidentally, I grabbed that image of Josh from this page. Take a look and see if anyone else there looks familiar.


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