Menopause Has Come To Neighbours

I’ll start by admitting that I’ve been quite excited by all the fuss Network Ten has been making over the past two months about the “change” that’s been coming to Neighbours, so now that it’s come and gone (well, not quite gone, per se), I thought I’d let you know if I think it was worth all the effort.

I quite like the new opening credit style; and the new version of the song isn’t what I thought it’d be (I thought it’d be some truly horrendous faux-rock attempt at ‘updating’ the theme, in the style of the short-lived wailing Home and Away theme that lasted for about three weeks at the start of the year - but thankfully it’s nothing of the sort).

The use of the photo booth motif in the opening credit sequence is a nice way of grouping the families and friendship circles together for the sake of the montage of smiling happy people; but I think they could have ended with a few more than just the four Poloroid-style shots at the end (if you’re curious, the Poloroids shown depict Karl and Susan; Paul and Elle; Oliver, Rebecca and the yet-to-be-introduced Declan; and Harold and Lou).

It strikes me that a clever and impressive thing for them to do (although I almost doubt they’d do it, despite my opinion that it’d be well within their power and not an extreme strain on their budget) would be to alternate the four final Poloroid shots to include the other families and groups. They could have Ned, Janae and Mickey; Frazer and Rosie; Carmella and Ringo; Adam and Pepper; Rachel and Zeke; Toadie and Steph; and newcomers Steve, Miranda and Bridget.

Of course, notable by their absence from the new credit sequence were Sky, Kerry, Boyd and Charlie. With the exception of Charlie, who was simply shafted from the opening credits and will be continuing with the show, the omission of the first three characters I just named make perfect sense. Here’s a tip: don’t expect them to see out the next fortnight on the show.

Thankfully, the opening whiny, extended “Ho-oh-oh” sound has been dropped - I always liked to sing it with an exaggerated reference to whoever had just been visible at the end of the “previously” bit, as if the first note was an insult being levelled at that character (who says I need to get out more?!). Frankly, I’d had enough of carrying out this daily ritual (not to mention that Wifey always held that the ad lib being sung was actually ‘Oh-oh-oh’ - but it simply wasn’t), so I’m very grateful that the new credits open instead with a building drum beat, designed to draw the viewer in with unstated excitement and anticipation.

While we’re on the subject of music, the show’s producers have done away with most of the merry little (commercial) ditties they used to play in every second scene; now we get constant semi-orchestral music in the background of just about the entire show. It’s a palatable change (some of those other tracks were getting a bit long in the tooth with how frequently they were replayed), but it’s very Home and Away.

Something else that has been discarded is the obligatory groan from the viewing audience during the opening moments of each episode. Yes, they’ve dropped the terrible puns in the titles of the episodes. Turning the writers’ focus back onto the stories rather than the clever little pithy way they can incorporate a well-known phrase or catchcry into a thematic wisecrack in three words or less would appear to be a good move. Although some of the episode titles over the past few years were admittedly quite clever and relevant and on occasions flat-out brilliant and highly amusing, it’s clear that the need to continue thinking up droll (or otherwise) titles that amount to a play on words or a double entrendre is just a waste of everyone’s time. We now find ourselves back in the creative vortex of naming the episodes ‘5274’ and so on.

Another aspect of the “new-look” Neighbours is the decidedly Home and Away-style of filming they’ve adopted. This approach might suit some, and perhaps it’s a more modern tactic, but there was always something I quite liked about the way Neighbours was filmed. It set itself apart from Home and Away’s more ‘trendy’ style. I should point out that Wifey’s far more adamant and passionate about this point than I am. But like I said to her, if I wanted to watch Home and Away, I’d … shoot myself in the head.

*drum fill*

I wondered if any of the sets were going to change as well, but apart from some more and different outdoor locations being implemented into the show (which is where the Home and Away-style of filming is most noticeable), the other sets appeared to be the same. However, I heard Harold telling someone that the ‘renovations’ being carried out on the General Store would be finished soon, which seemed like a great way to retcon the idea of extending the set and changing things around a bit (because I don’t recall anyone mentioning any such renovations before now - although it’s possible I just missed it).

New characters were introduced in the form of Ned’s heretofore unmentioned older brother Steve (and his family), to whom he has apparently “never stopped raving about Melbourne”; hence their decision to pack everything up and move down here without setting up a house or organising their careers. Sounds perfectly plausible to me. Susan threw in a casual reference to having once met them at Drew’s funeral; a nice little touch by the writers to remind us all that Drew hailed from the country town of Oakey just like the Parker family - but perhaps a bit of a stretch, because surely Susan would have been beside herself with grief at the time, and may not necessarily instantly recognise people she’d met five years ago at such an emotion-charged event. But then again, what would I know?

It was hard not to miss how often everyone was cracking jokes and being a bit of a funnyman. About halfway through the episode I turned to Wifey and said, “Everyone’s a comedian”, because it was already starting to feel unrealistic (inasmuch as that’s EVER possible on Neighbours, of course!), but thankfully it doesn’t appear to have remained a constant and isn’t one of the changes to the show.

However, I think I’m going to have to draw the line at the joey kangaroo. As luck would have it, the Parkers were still on their way into Melbourne (from Brisbane) when they happened upon some road kill in the form of a female kangaroo. Lying nearby - supposedly unhurt - was the newly orphaned joey, who later named ‘Pouch’ by Mickey, who is probably undeservedly proud of himself for coming up with the name. I don’t know why Ramsay Street needed to suddenly include such a thoroughly common native Australian animal as a pet (because - you know - we ALL have kangaroos at home), but perhaps the kitten, chickens, turtle, gallah, sheep and twenty-two dogs who already reside on the street weren’t enough animals living in six consecutive houses to cover all their bases. So it’s a good thing Steve Parker’s a veterinarian - the residents of Ramsay Street alone should keep him gainfully employed for many years to come!

UPDATE: It turns out that I was right about the rotating Poloroid shots at the end of the opening credits - the new official website (check it out if you‘re so inclined, because it’s MUCH better than anything that’s gone before) shows a lengthy promotion of footage from the upcoming few months of the show (but be warned, the video contains considerable spoilers - you don’t have to watch it, though) … which ends with a different set of Poloroids than the four we’ve seen on the show so far. I’m not sure how frequently the shots will alternate, but I presume that this means we’ll be seeing different shots in the opening credit sequence before too long.

The other thing the website’s promo shows is that a new version of the opening credits isn’t too far away (so perhaps the Poloroid shots will only change each time the entire opening sequence is modified or updated). A brother for Bridget (Steve and Miranda) is on the way, and soon we‘ll see him tackling Bridget for the football before it gets thrown to their parents.

In short, there’s much I quite like about the “change” that’s just come to Neighbours. I like the new version of the song, I like the new opening and closing credits, I like the new characters and sets, and I like the gutsy, bold move they made to highlight the changes (rather than try to slip them through, under the radar). I’m not completely against the addition of the baby kangaroo, I don’t mind a few more lighthearted moments being included on the show (as long as they keep them in check), and the new filming style will also probably grow on me. So I’m definitely a fan of the new-look Neighbours. If you haven’t checked it out for yourself yet, I reckon you should have a look and see what you think.

Who knows? You might come for the credit sequence, and stay for the drama and intrigue.

(Unlikely, though.)



You can also see the giant (spoiler-filled) promo for yourself, if you dare, by visiting YouTube.


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