Too Many 'Special' Fat Losers

Okay, I'm going to officially go on record as saying it: I don't care about all the Fat Loser specials out there.

First, we're shown the original Biggest Loser series, which is (of course) American. Wifey and I quite enjoyed that, and surprised ourselves a little. Then series two aired, although Wifey and I didn't watch that one. Then we get our own Australian version of the show, which I thought was great. And for once, I liked the decision to bring the American trainers over to feature on the show. It was great to get their perspective of Australia, Australians, and the comparisons between that series and the two previous American seasons.

But then things started to get a little weird.

First, there was a one-off special, spanning the entire thirteen weeks or whatever it was in one night, that pitted one fat family against another fat family. Tastefully, it was a case of blacks versus whites. And because America wouldn't have it any other way, the 'whites' won. (Actually, Otto lost such an incredible amount of weight, their win wasn't too surprising. The moment probably would have had a bigger impact on me if Network Ten hadn't stupidly decided to show a shot of the newer, thinner Otto in their promo, thereby removing any motivation for me to watch it through and see the results the way the writer/producers intended. As a result, I watched most of this special on fast forward. I thought it was interesting that once the white family won the final weigh-in, the black family were completely ignored. No runner-up prize (apart from their health, I suppose), no "congratulations to you guys, too", no shaking of their hands and thanking them for being such great sports. The host and the winning family completely blocked them out of the shot with their cheering (which is fair enough in a way), and while they stood behind the white family, smiling and clapping, the black family were duly disregarded as so much excess fat. Nice.

Then, just one week later, we were subjected to another "Fattest Loser" special. This time it was the battle of the bulge between two brides-to-be. They may as well have subtitled this one: "Who's marrying the biggest whale?" This show was anything but respectful. If you're gonna be a thin bride no matter what, why appear on an international television show to let everyone see just how large you were to start off with and how you went through hell to get where you are? Where's the dignity? (Probably laughing all the way to the bank with the $50,000 cheque.) To tell you the truth, I didn't even bother watching to the end. My tip is: One of the fat loser brides-to-be won the money, and the other one didn't.

And then the other night Australia was subjected to even more frantic Fattest Loser fandom, when all twelve original contestants from the first Australian series appeared on the Sandra Sully quiz show Australia's Brainiest <insert category here> special. The most upsetting thing about this was that Shane was ROBBED! ROBBED I TELL YOU!

I would have preferred Fiona, Artie or even Tracy to win rather than Joker-face Jo. That woman distresses me with her freaky eyebrows and her scary mega-grinning mouth. I CAN'T HANDLE LOOKING AT HER! At least Tracy, who I loath for personality reasons, doesn't make my internal organs want to run and hide behind a rock. The terrible she-mullet she'd elected to wear ON NATIONAL TV just truly capped off a completely unsettling physical appearance. Hopefully she'l join the circus and be done with it.

Amidst all this, you may recall that I received a whinging email from Artie, and we've seen the ads promoting auditions for the second Australian series. The only good thing about that is we'll be seeing more of Bob and Jillian on our shores (at least, I hope we will!), but otherwise I'm feeling a little over it.

I'd change the channel and be done with it, but I can't find the remote control, and there's no way I'm lifting my huge arse off the couch unless it's to get me some more fried chicken.

<BURP!>

The most enjoyable part of watching Australia's Brainest Fat Loser was seeing the lovely red dress Sandra Sully was wearing. Although fairly run-of-the-mill when she walked on stage at the beginning of the show, from the moment it cut to the lowered camera that films her at the podium (facing up), the angle made it appear that she was filming the show in her underwear!

I'm not being perverted, here: Wifey will attest to the fact that once observed, the image of her standing there wearing nothing more than a red bra was very distracting! (Of course, I guess it doesn't hurt that this is Sandra Sully we're talking about, either ...) The dress was made out of material that passed (on screen, anyway) for a bra, and if you don't believe me, I have proof:



Sandra realising she's only wearing her bra.



Sandra not caring she's only wearing her bra.

Who needs The Wedge? The 'Sandra Sultry' parody in particular is completely redundant if the real woman is going to host TV shows in her underwear ...

(I'm pretty much looking for any reason to get rid of The Wedge.)

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